Im so nervous to talk about this but here goes everything. I was 12 years old when It all started, I didn't understand my body, feelings,emotions. When my brother approached me. It seem harmless because I was innocent and didn't understand what was happening to me, it went on for years I was forced to keep doing it. Years later I realised this is wrong and I did not want to this anymore so when I told my mother about it, I was buturally beated bleeding and weeping on the floor my mother had hit me for what seem like an hour, viciously called every name under the under, shamed for it and emotional torn... because "I WANTED IT" it's has left me in such emotional scarring that I told I could never heal from but thankful I did. And I forgave my family and in my heart i was at peace. I am not longer suicidal, self-harm, no resent that burdens my heart and soul, no hatred to weight me... I'm free and now I have a child of my own which I fight for everyday, within myself, my mental health issues everybody because I strive to give him everything I didn't have and nothing I went though.
So this is a message to all you out there, it does get better!! And you will heal it will still hurt but not as much you just have to push everything inside of you to keep on going I hope you see that just as I do, and please don't hold hatred in your heart because hatred is the posion that melts the heart. And there's a saying in Russian "The strongest steel is forged by the hottest of fires" coming out of this experience has made me stronger and durable, no one could go through the experience we went through. good luck to you all and I hope you can find peace one day
