Paige- 19

This happened Saturday August 31 of 2019. I was 16 at the time and so was my boyfriend ay the time. Me and my boyfriend at the time were at one of his family members campers at a river lot. At the beginning of the month he had scoliosis surgery, and so he was in pain yet. He was hurting and I think tired at the time so he went to go lay down and I went with him we ended falling asleep and I was woken up at one point to him reaching his hand down my pants. I never once gave him consent to touch me while I was sleeping, he never once checked to make sure it was okay with me. I did consent to things before that day and everything and even after the incident but I never once gave an okay or even implied that he could touch me in my sleep. I stayed in the relationship after that and he ended up leaving me for someone else in October of 2020. I didn't realize what happened on the day this occurred until after he left me. I've never spoken out about this, its something I have been carrying on my shoulders for too long.

How did this make you feel? What would you say to someone who has been through the same thing?

This incident made and still makes me feel disgusting. I constantly feel filthy and when I process this again it makes me feel even dirtier. I must say it does get easier after awhile but for me it is still constantly in my mind. I got rid of the outfit I wore that day I couldn't even stand to look at it anymore. If you or someone you know has gone through something similar or the same please be there for them. Just know it gets easier but it will haunt you, you gotta stay strong and have a good support system. Remember you don't owe anyone anything, you do what makes you comfortable. At the end of the day work on self love, you are worth it. To every single person that may read this, I love you <3

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